charity begins at ,000
2004-11-15

Having been alerted by a friend to the existence of the Paris Review auctions, I decided to go and check them out myself. Currently the only auctions close to meeting their estimated value are the table reading with the Simpsons writers, tickets to "Inside the Actors Studio", and a tour of the Harvard Lampoon. Apparently the prospect of immortalizing yourself and a friend through Prairie Home Companion isn't worth $5000. Poor Garrison Keilor. He isn't much of a draw for char-i-dee, is he? What about the children, Garrison?

Now get ready for a real charity auction. Can you handle it?

$10,301 dollars for Clay Aiken's handprints.

As of the time of writing, that is. The auction goes til about Saturday so someone will probably end up spending the equivalent of the cost of a cheap car on what is basically a baby memento from a pseudopopstar.

(Secretly I am jus jellus that I can't buy it myself and build a shrine to it in my living room and pray to it and use it as an altar to commit voodoo rituals against Simon Cowell for making Clay come in second in American Idol 2. Whoever buys this, I hope they appreciate it just the way I would.)