did you spell that right Tamra
2004-12-14

Just came back from a lovely time in Chicago. K. and I (with at some points K's lovely boyfriend A.) toured the little town of Evanston and saw temples and Art Institutes and Hull House (where the tour guide seemed shocked that we weren't social workers. Apparently the place is like a pilgrimage for social workers. Not surprising.) And I helped grade papers in preparation for my possible academic future, which was aided by K. and A. sitting through me yelling at them for hours over my academic statement. And then they helped me, which was very generous of them. And I had some lovely sangria with K's friend L, who is also lovely for remembering where the bar was with the nice sangria. Although for some reason the mojito was made with mint syrup instead of real mint, but that didn't matter because it was 4 (!) dollars. Hooray!

People are being very vague around me lately. A lot of "secret plans," "potential good news." Probably they involve 1. parties I am not invited to 2. offers of vacation home time-sharing that my job will not allow me to participate in 3. some sort of blood rite.

In any case, I am back at work after a late flight home, with a lot of non-vague work waiting for me. Which I should go do. Right now.

Update: just checked my mail and got a rather pissed off reply from a professor I wanted to ask for a recommendation. Looks like the proposed academic career is off as even if I manage to ingratiate myself with the man again, he's already on his Christmas recommendation-writing break and won't start up writing recommendations again until after my deadline has passed.

It's really too bad as I could have finally watched "Bridget Jones's Diary" with K. if I didn't have to waste all that time on that NOW-WORTHLESS statement. Then again, $50 towards application can now be spent on alcohol and overpriced lunch food.

(I really am very upset over this, I swear.)

Update update: Was discussing destruction of possible academic career with work acquaintance when boss came back from office. Attempted to warn acquaintance by making ridiculous faces that it might be best to suddenly go quiet, but ridiculous faces did not stop her from discussing how her experience on a graduate school admissions committee totally applied in my particular situation. Now I'm in the probable position of having my boss flat-out know that I am attempting to apply for school, only to not actually be able to apply for school since I am not worth professor's writing time. Perfection!

Update(3):

Have been informed of real nature of "potential good news," unfortunately it is very potential, even more so than the potential missed vacation and possibly even more so than the blood rite. Apparently a distant relative knows somebody who might possibly still work at a magazine, and my parents decided to tell me this because they (my parents) "thought I'd be good at the job." This kind of thing always works out, because as we know there's nothing that people who (possibly) work at magazines want more to do than to hire their friend's third cousin's daughter.

It's depressing as my parents keep on thinking up "good jobs" for me like "professor" and "assistant at major magazine with extremely slight familial connection" that I know I have absolutely no chance of ever getting. I mean, I have more of a chance of becoming a carny than of becoming a full professor. Actually I don't want to be a professor. The reason I want to go to grad school is so I can fuck around, sleep in, and say that I want to go into TV or radio once I get my M.A., so people will think I am creative. That's why I didn't apply to an Ivy League school, because I totally could have gotten in. It would just be morally wrong to waste all that tuition money on base and ulterior motives.

The "secret" is still up in the air, though. Will update that as more news comes in.

Update 3 1/2:

Just wrote email to professor with offer to send recommendation forms overnight. A desperate attempt to salvage my fake creative career.