PRANCE FOR YOUR LIFE!
2005-07-20

What I Watched On My Summer Vacation Part A Million - So You Think You Can Dance

You can tell that a lot of thought went into making this show. It's like American Idol only without the voting and the singing and the prize. And it's like Dancing With the Stars only without stars. Basically dancers do routines in front of judges/judge to questionably appropriate music and then something happens, what exactly I'm not sure. Some of the dancers are ok, some are not ok. Nobody seems especially enthused, at least none of the contestants are...

Instead of Simon, Paula, and Randy there's MASTER CHOREOGRAPHER Nigel Lythgoe, his wife, and some guy whose name doesn't matter because Nigel fires the other two halfway in so he can get more facetime. Nigel differs from Simon in that he has a mullet and feels free to comment on the lady dancers' tits. There's a truly majestic moment where he starts ragging on some especially fey dancer, because you know, dancing is totally not a career path where it's OK to be gay. If you ever wanted to see Nigel Lythgoe assert his masculinity* over a guy who does a gymnastic routine with a ribbon, this show is for you.

I can't even remember the rest right now, frankly. There was some fat dancer who had "heart" or something. Yeah, and Paula Abdul's supposed to be on at some point.

* pics not for the squeamish!