living in shame
2005-11-14

I'm freaking out - my apartment has THE MICE. There are scritchy sounds at night and nasty looking specks on the floor. I feel terribly guilty, because I'm sure that my personal nastiness has invited the little critters in (as opposed to just general wear and tear or nastiness on other people's part). I feel especially guilty for being stupid enough to cook in a NYC apartment. If I had only eaten soup alone, like a sane person would, this whole thing wouldn't have happened.

Now not only must I spray various and sundry materials round the apartment and buy metal garbage cans, I have to poke steel wool into the floor and look into the Mystery Holes that I would prefer to leave undisturbed (such as behind the fridge and under the sink). Of course, even if I completely seal the apartment there's no guarantee that I won't overlook the one teensy hole behind the furnace and the mice won't keep pouring in. I also have to set out traps for whatever's skittering in the walls at night and then look at their creepy dead bodies afterwards, if they bother to kill themselves for a bit of peanut butter, of course.

I have the sinking feeling that this is going to be an "I" event. My roommate is the type of person who gets highly upset over toilet bowl stains (OH NO THE POO TURNS IT COLORS) but she doesn't seem to want to bother with sweeping or cleaning counters, much less plugging up mouseholes. I'll have to call S. to help out, then listen to Roommate bitch because we disturbed her "Survivor" watching in the name of hygiene.

The real problem is that I want to keep cooking, yet I wouldn't eat anywhere with an (obvious) mouse infestation (despite the fact that realistically, restaurants and grocery stores are usually going to have a few critters) SO WHY WOULD I EAT IN MY OWN HOUSE? It's the equivalent of keeping eating after a roach runs over your table at a restaurant (yes, I have had this happen, although I didn't keep eating, of course). I guess I will have to clean out the cupboards and exist on canned soup alone. At least I will lose weight.