time for bed
2005-04-03

Just got done watching Super Size Me. It's Michael Moore lite - you get the man-on-the-street shots, the five minute horror stories about liver disease and fattie children, and then the director does something dull. Moore usually does this by going up to some bigwig, asking them to talk, and getting a sad sanctimonious expression on his face when they turn him down. Morgan Spurlock doesn't bother - he makes a couple of calls to McDonald's headquarters, then quits. Instead he takes it all on himself by eating all McDonald's all the time for a month. Not surprisingly, Spurlock gets fat and feels like shit. You get to see him throw up, and whine a bunch about how eating McDonald's all the time makes him feel like shit and lose erectile function. It's fascinating.

Unfortunately there isn't any real villain in the film so I didn't end up with that righteous "FUCK GEORGE W. BUSH" feeling that you get from, say, Fahrenheit 9/11. Instead, I found myself rolling my eyes, because Spurlock lives in what looks to be a Soho walkup with a girlfriend who is a vegan chef, so he's pretty much fucking set, fitness wise. Nobody ever examines the alternatives to McDonald's - why don't people cook for themselves, why isn't there better food at supermarkets. I know the reason I don't do it is because I wasn't allowed to touch the stove as a child, so on one hand I never set the house on fire, but on the other I have absolutely no cooking skills. My mother never cooked, either, so she didn't have any skills to pass down to me. (No, this was not because our family had a maid, we had a microwave and a Chinese take-out menu.) The people I know who cook generally have older family members who cook, too. People are trained to eat out of boxes because that's what they grew up on and it's a waste of time to make food that you will probably ruin somehow anyway.

Apparently in Europe everyone goes around to small shops where they buy all the ingredients for the day's meal, and that's why they're so thin, but their way of life is being destroyed by Muslims according to CNN so obviously we should import them all here, so we can preserve their ancient teachings of thinness while indoctrinating them in the culture of life so we have more soldiers for the new Crusades. Thin soldiers.

I'm very tired, I was out late last night dancing and watching the Pope's death watch on CNN at the same time, so forgive me for making no sense.